Not a romantic evening with your loved one

Imagine this picture. You spent two hours in the kitchen to make a specialty. There is a fresh tablecloth on the table, the dish is served beautifully, like in a restaurant, candles are burning. You put on your best dress, which is usually worn in special cases, made up for and made up. Sounds quiet romantic music, you are ready to meet your beloved man, for whom a romantic surprise was prepared. And here it is - the long-awaited sound of the key turning in the door.

You rush on your neck, beloved and chirping, how glad you are to see him, and he frowns at you on the cheek, pushes him away and goes to the bathroom to wash his hands. Silently passes by the table, behind which you wait for him with a smile, looks with an unseeing glance at the wall and begins to eat. Your questions are ignored. Your efforts have gone unnoticed. The part of the program you wanted to go to after supper does not feel like doing it. . .

Who is to blame and what to do

Admit it: you were inwardly shuddered if you clearly pictured the situation described in the imagination. Judging by the women's forums, every third already experienced something similar and remained at a loss: what was it at all? Most likely, "it" was not even worth taking to a personal account. Every man has his own reason to remain silent, for example, difficulties at work. If you still suspect that the case is in you, do a little analysis of the past. Each pair has a personal story, which contains answers to all questions. Remember, was not this:
  1. He said over the past dinner: "Thank you, very tasty." And you started him, tired after work, to torture with a long story, how exactly all this was prepared and why, and then tortured with questions in the spirit: "Did you really like it? "If you squeeze out compliments from a man, he will not give them out in more. Just the next time she keeps silent to avoid a tense conversation. Men by nature do not know how to speak the language that caresses your ears. With a silent smile, accept gratitude in the form in which he expresses it.
  2. Once in the past, after a wonderful romantic evening, you created a false expectation that he would appreciate your efforts and do something for them in return. But a few days went by, but the miracle did not happen. And then you exploded, made a scandal on the topic: "I'm for you - that ... And you for me - nothing! "If you were counting on understanding, you lost it. Hysteria, you just crossed out the good things you did before.
  3. Every time you used to do something good for him, the reason was not in sincere concern, but in the desire to create a prelude to articulate your demands. For example, as soon as he lifted his fork to his mouth, you started to press on the topic: "It's time to make up with my mother." Do you remember the school textbook on biology, the paragraph about Pavlov's dog? If you do not want to see your man immediately at the sight of dinner, avoid difficult topics.
If you do not remember such sinners, and the man looks quite kind, but still does not praise you for your efforts, there is still another option ... Perhaps the dinner is not tasty, and he does not want to offend you :-)

How to make a surprise pleasant

If you are ashamed to know yourself in one of the stories above, work on the errors. Such patterns of behavior are precisely manifested not only in the situation with dinner, but in many others - so get rid of them. Only after that it makes sense to re-arrange a romantic surprise. Also be ready to that the man not from the first time will concern to it or this easy, not expecting a dirty trick.

If you behave wisely, and for the last failed romantic dinner, the man was just tired and diffused, next time start warming up his interest in advance. Write him the first message in the morning: "Darling, tonight you are waiting for something special. Come early ;-) ". At lunch time, continue to tease him with hints, so he could not wait to get home. Do not tell the whole program for the evening in detail, say that there will be "something more secret".

And most importantly : when organizing an evening, do not think about what you would like to do, but about what will be pleasing to him. If you guess, your man will blur out in such a sincere smile that words will be superfluous.
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About the author

Эльвина Примакова

By education - a psychologist, a teacher of psychology. She is married and has a daughter: she is three years old. Daily I consolidate the theory studied in practice :-) I like to share my experience, I will be glad to your questions and comments.

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